Fake It ‘Til You Make It

A Great Idea …

“If you simply pretend to be extraverted when you’re with others-that is, if you act bold, talkative, energetic, active, assertive, and adventurous-no matter what your natural inclinations are, you’ll extract more positivity from those social exchanges.” (Barbara Frederickson, in her book, Positivity, p. 191)

In Other Words …

Most of us feel shy or want to withdraw from others sometimes. Yet, if we treat people as if they were friends, they often become friends. And we enjoy happiness as the fortunate side-effect.

How this Applies to You …

The next time you are tempted to withdraw from a group or person, make a special effort to be sociable and cheerful. You can always ask, “What’s the most interesting thing you’ve done today?”

To Find Out More …

For more great ideas (or to share your ideas), check out our Navigating Life’s Journey blog

For excellent (and free!) programs on improving your personal well being, check out Managing Stress and The Personal Journey at www.arfamilies.org.

For more information, we recommend Positivity by Barbara Frederickson or The How of Happiness by Sonja Lyubomirsky.

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  • Reply Rachelle January 21, 2012 at 10:28 am

    When I saw the title of this, I was already forming inm y mind the list of things I would say about this – most of them not nice.This is not at all what I expected.

    “Fake it till you make” has been so overused in my world, mostly by people trying to get me to do something that they wanted me to do that I did not care to do.

    What a surprise and very pleasant too! Your comments are so kind and positive. This is not at all what I expected. The closest friends I have are ones I treated as friends when we first met. Thank you!

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