Not Imprisoned By Emotions

A Great Idea …

“Here is one of the great keys to success in life, a closely guarded and little known secret: you don’t have to behave the way you feel. You have a choice. You can feel angry and frustrated inside and acknowledge your feelings, but behave in a loving way.” (Susan Page, in her book, Why Talking is Not Enough, p. 71)

In Other Words …

We do not have to be governed by our passions. We can choose to act in ways that build the relationship even when we are frustrated or disappointed. We can practice restraint. We can offer acceptance. We can practice compassion. We don’t have to let our partner’s actions or our temporary feelings undermine our commitments.

How This Applies to You…

The next time you feel upset with your partner, make the choice to act in ways that are true to your commitments. If you are tempted to criticize, choose to be compassionate. If you feel like blaming, choose instead to cherish and forgive.

To Find Out More…

For more great ideas (or to share your ideas) check out the Navigating Life’s Journey blog

For an excellent (and free!) program on marriage, see The Marriage Garden at Arkansas Families.

For an excellent book focused on marriage, read Why Talking is Not Enough by Susan Page or The Marriage Garden by H. Wallace Goddard and James P. Marshall.

Author: H. Wallace Goddard

Wally Goddard is a retired professor of Family Life having served in Arkansas and Alabama. He developed programs on personal well-being, marriage, and parenting. He is well known for his many creative family programs, including The Marriage Garden, The Parenting Journey, and Blueprint for Happiness. Wally has authored or co-authored several books including Between Parent and Child, The Soft-Spoken Parent, and Drawing Heaven into Your Marriage. He has been recognized by his colleagues with several awards including the Outstanding Family Life Educator Award. Wally and his wife, Nancy, have three adult children, fourteen grandchildren, and have cared for many foster children over the years. Wally describes Nancy as the finest human being he has ever known. View all posts by H. Wallace Goddard